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Being a good parent
Love & Friendship
Considering sex:
1) Important choices
2) Meeting a potential partner
3) Sex and safety, hand in hand
4) Giving and taking pleasure

 

Meeting a potential partner

Try to make opportunities to meet the sorts of people with whom you're likely to have shared interests. A good place to start is by doing the sorts of activities and hobbies that you already think you'd be interested in, such as dance clubs, music societies, theatre groups, swim teams, and evening-time college courses. Be inventive and adventurous in thinking about how and where you will meet potential new friends.

Try to think ahead. If you invite someone to come see a movie, you aren't going to spend much time chatting with each other, so you'd do better to ask them to come to a party or an art gallery or some other event.

It might feel embarrassing being attracted to someone, but it certainly isn't shameful. Young men and women are very often interested in physical contact just as much as each other, and either person can make the first move.

If you're gay, lesbian, or bisexual - or you think you might be - and you haven't told anyone, don't feel pressure to 'come out'. It's an individual decision and it shouldn't be hurried. If you do feel ready, just telling one trustworthy person can feel like a huge relief; or phone the national gay and lesbian switchboard, or perhaps surf the web to find out whether there's a gay youth group in your home area. Essentially, you're looking for somewhere to meet other people who are experiencing the same feelings and asking the same questions as you. Reading biographies can also be a helpful way to learn about lesbian, gay or bisexual individuals who've faced many of the same challenges that you are, and who have led happy and accomplished lives.

Getting to know each other:

When flirting with someone, you can simply hold eye contact with them a moment or two longer than is necessary, but be sure to smile warmly so that they don't think you're just staring. Be aware that touching them in any way may be unwelcome unless you are very sure the other person is inviting a more physical relationship with you. Even so, bear in mind that physical doesn't necessarily mean sexual. If someone gives you a hug, or a shoulder rub, or a peck on the cheek, they are not necessarily being sexual, though they might still mean these to be very tender, caring and affectionate gestures.

You will probably have to spend a few occasions in each other's company before you are confident enough to kiss, mouth to mouth. It may be a matter of asking respectfully whether the other person wants to give things a go. "May I kiss you?" is as good a start as any, or it may just happen spontaneously between you, because kissing can be one of the most intimate and pleasurable things you can share.

From kissing, you can both decide whether or not to continue to more intimate physical relations, or whether to cool it and meet someone else. If you discover that your attentions to the other person are unwanted, be proud that you have tried at least, and take comfort in the hope that someone right for you is probably just around the corner - and all the more so if you get out and about and meet people.

If things go well between the two of you, take your time to build up some confidence and comfortable familiarity with each other. Just a few meetings might be enough, or it might take months, it all depends on the two individuals involved and how much good time you can spend in each other's company. Be patient because it will help enormously to have developed a really trusting and open relationship before you embark upon more personal physical relations.

Cuddling with your partner is probably one of the most important ways to share physical pleasure. Also, massaging your partner's head, neck, shoulders and back, as well as kissing and stroking their face and body, will all make such a difference to how comfortable and relaxed your partner feels with you.

Always be considerate of the other person and how they might be feeling. A good rule is to treat your partner with the caring, honesty and respect with which you yourself would like to be treated. And, of course, resist the urge to blab to all your friends about the physical and personal details of a relationship that is by its very nature private and between the two of you.

If you enjoyed the above section, you might like to take a look at these:
· Love & friendship
· Feeling comfortable with your body
· Communicating your emotions

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